RESULTS

Hahaha...getting my results of my first exam is really a humerous story....for starters...i flunked all my paper except MUET(if i ever fail my MUET i think i shud eirther be dead or gone all crazy)..you all know how STPM marking and scoring system is right(well for you dummies who don't know...you are concidered failed if you get less than 50% but you still get GPA..but u really really have failed and get no GPA if you get F(<34 marks)...wana know my marks????

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Lets see.....which order should i go in? Highest?Lowest..(as if it matters....)

Pengajian Am-42 (FAILED)..and dropped 20 marks from last year
Biology- 37 (FAILED) ...and dropped 20 marks from last year
Chemistry-18(FAILED,FLUNKED,CRAPPED,DISSAPOINTED,) dropped 20 marks from last year
MUET- Reading-59/120 isn't that just shitty..i try and try.. i just CANT SCORE THIS PAPER!!!
- Writing-62/90..i know i can improve on it
-Listening 36/45..i have not realised i have good listening skills(coz when someone is telling a very very long story...or when the teachers teach continously...my brain tuned off after 15 minutes..I CANT LISTEN ANYMORE)
-Speaking-39/45...this proves that i am noisy and talkative(thank god for that)

Lastly(DRUMROLLS............................................................................................................)

MATHEMATICS 35(FAILED)...but increased 20 marks from LAST YEAR..YEAY BABY...i am going to obsess on these topics and get "brain-fucked" till I master then like i Mastered Add-Maths.WOHOO.....

Somehow...its very scary knowing that i actually have either increased of dropped EXACTLY 20 marks for each paper minus MUET la....

But i cant seem to see Pn Lee's face....she has done a good job and because of my lazines...she has to suffer.....

It's ok...i will do all my best in my mid-term exam....(planning to pass every paper....can i do it?..of coz...)

I learnt something....in order to have maximum brain capasity when studying....either take weed...get horny.....mastrubate or listen to music.......luckily for me...i dun go drugs....nor do i mastrubate.....but the horny and music thing is the best thing and god has given me a gift called Adam Lambert...who gets me horny...who's music turns me on and calms me down....and whose music turns me on as well...so kudos Lambert....

But i need support from my family and friends who can just take the effort to (SMS,Email,FB,MMS,visiting,) me and just check up on me and give me encouragement....and make me push myself...

GTG now...have to study BIOLOGY!!AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!...

Adios amigos

=)

I see everywhere i turn....faces of couples let it be a guy-gal or guy-guy or gal-gal....it seems nice and touching to be able to share a part of your life with someone and just being yourself when you are with them and confiding in them...laugh with them of break down infront of them with the confidence that that your broken pieces will be picked up by them....when i see such things...i feel happy for them....but the stone part of my heart only thinks of the pain that might hurt us....

My heart is divided in to 2 parts.(three quarter cold stone and one quarter warmth).....so i am just fine by looking at these things and feeling happy.....but the one quarter part...yearns to be loved or even love (but with everything that has happened in my life...i have learnt not to put confidence in people because they will dissapoint....so i live life close to people yet set a nanometer boundary)....
(SORRY FOR THE EMONESS...its the influence of the songs i listen to)

Having a guy in my life will be fun...and i have alot of guys in my life...infact most of my f6 friends are guys....but some1 to have a real thing or even a fling will be cool to reduce the stress of STPM(would that mean i cant cuci mata anymore??)...haha....getting turned on by guys.....or getting high listening to guys(adamgasm to be specific.....which is an official word in Urban Dictionary)...hahah....is very cool and very entertaining(something i need in my boring life now)....but i like the hugging(the best hugs i got was from Jit btw...i miss his hugs)....but its nice to hug....i think people shud hug more......

BAKING

Baking is an activity that brings joy to me(although it doesnt turn out as i wnt it to be...like today's cookie)...baked with michelle and caryn....by taking alot of pics....and going not so crazy because my mum was having tuition.....but Caryn is the worst baking partner u can get...but thank god this project was a trio(sorry Caryn)....with michelle(my son whom i named Dick)....who got married to Caryn.(who somehow became my son in law....bizzare)....and the weirdest part is...my son is 7 months older than me...heheheheheheh.....and while baking...we enjoyed looking at Caryn's laptop with LOTS of pics and videos(and learnt she cant act...sorry caryn)....we made a few batch....and got lazy and spreaded everything onto one pan and baked it as browines(pouring melted choc on it...that one tasted good)...michelle said she doesnt like it...but kept on eating it anyhow(no wonder she is getting fatter...and hairer)...lol...after that watched american idol...shioban was the best....she kinda reminded me of Adam Lambert with her screams......and i got obsessed with Adam again after 1 day controlling myself

Deep Thoughts

All my life i have always wanted, to be able to accomplish great things like travel around the world and to meet weird people with weird cultures....but the thing is...i am stuck....i feel like my left-handedness is being sucked out of me by the demon i call form6.....as i was a TV addict before who watches 4-5 hours of TV everyday am now only watching 4-5 hours TV per week....its been months since i have even watched The Lord of the Rings.....i don't read anymore nor do i write(i do write....but just intelectual stuffs such as shit MUET essays.....PA and the other craps i study at school)....i want to do more....i did it last year for 6 months when i joined theatre...those were the best 6 months of my life...and i miss it.....i miss my old buddies with whom i can joke and laugh and talk nonsence with...having sleepovers and getting high in alcohol....but now....most of the conversation revolves around getting 4.0 CGPA...and getting A+ or credits....those things just put me to sleep....i want creative conversations not intelectual ones....i havent cried for a year or so....so the before yesterday when i listened to Adam Lambert(who is very HOTT and SEXXYY btw) "A Loaded Smile".....i just teared up...and decided to cry as my friend said "crying is good".......and i ended up crying for 1 hour for no reason.....just letting out all the frustration of life....my mum....my dog with cancer and the fact that i resent some ppl....i can't even fullfill my resolutions...thats how sad my life is....a simple resolution of going on a date b4 turning 19 (i can flush it down the toilet)....and my mum asked me if i was a lesbian...i mean common....just bcoz i think guys in school are lame doesnt make me gay(although i am soo gay for Megan Fox)...she said i am not feminine enough...and said i have a heart of stone(which i wonder sometimes myself....i mean currently my bro is going out on dates with this gal...and when he tells me the stories...i just feel bored and feel like its nonsence and feel like puking))....hahhhah.....i cudnt care less...i mean i like songs that talk about anal sex...what else can i expect from myself....i am who i am....i am happy with life...god has blessed me with good health and financially we are doing very good compared to b4 and i still have my family......so i am trying to get in touch with my creative side by writing a drama script for Teacher's Day(hopefully it happens....having witer's block).....teaching myself to play the piano( i cant seem to master guitar though).....and trying some singing.....and of course cooking...baking....hopefully i get a breakthrough from this boring life that i live now